Combined with last week's "BERN IN HELL" headline regarding the Madoff sentencing, the Metro is trying its darndest to sound like the NY Post or Boston Herald day by day. Puns sell papers, don't they? Even if it's a free daily? Let's not be delusional here, Metro.
Nobody chooses the Metro for its snappy pun-filled headlines. They do so for one or more of these reasons:
- It was free
- Some guy at the T stop was handing them out so I instinctively took one
- It was lying on the train seat next to me
- There was a puddle of something on the seat next to me so I used the copy on the floor to cover it
- I get off on rehashed AP articles and unfunny comic strips
Teasers on the front page ought to make a reader want to go to there because "I want to know what happened" or "I want to know more about what happened" and not because "I want to know what in the hell they're talking about." Oh, hell. Does it really matter anymore? Probably not. We'll be seeing teasers soon that say things like "OMG!! Page 14" or perhaps simply just "Page 8" and nobody will care either way.
You'll pardon me for weeping soft for the sad state of the newspaper industry because I finally started in (no spoilers now, it's new to me!) on Season 5 of The Wire and part of the story arc involves the Baltimore Sun and its fishwrappy problems. It's depressin' all around, and it's too early for whisky.