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EXCELSIOR, YOU FATHEAD!

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December 10th, 2003


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07:45 pm - Seen on a car windshield at the corner of Summer and Lowell
A note reading, in part (and I'm slightly paraphrasing here and cleaning up spelling):
YOU ASSHOLE.
I DID NOT SPEND THREE HOURS SHOVELLING OUT THIS SPOT SO THAT YOU COULD PARK IN IT.
THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU.
YOU ARE NOT AN AMERICAN.

Yeah, Somervillians tend to get mighty territorial out here when the snow drops.

(8 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


(Deleted comment)
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From:derspatchel
Date:December 11th, 2003 12:59 am (UTC)
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Amazingly enough, nope. The car was gone a few hours after I walked by it.

I'm guessing the shoveler considered the patriotic indictment punishment enough.
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From:spritelord
Date:December 11th, 2003 01:50 am (UTC)

From Chicago, a solution.

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Round here, you shovel out a spot and put a lawn chair or two in it. And then nobody takes it. It works.

Odd, innit?
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From:trysha
Date:December 11th, 2003 03:34 am (UTC)
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Here you cann also put a lawn chair into the spot.

Someone will drive over the lawn chair and put a note on the windshield saying "your chair is underneath my car"
From:cropherb
Date:December 11th, 2003 09:16 pm (UTC)
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I think the reason why Chicagoans respect the lawn chair is everyone at least half-believes that great urban myth that goes around about how someone once dissed the lawn chair and parked in someone else's carefully shoveled spot, so the shoveler turned a garden hose on the offending car until it had a three-inch thick coating of solid ice all over. Nothing like a little incredibly poetic vigiliante justice to put the respect in people.
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From:wahhappen
Date:December 13th, 2003 06:00 am (UTC)
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YESSSS!! Poetic justice.
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From:cheezdanish
Date:December 11th, 2003 02:20 am (UTC)
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Oh my, somebody's getting sassy. At least they didn't call the FBI or HUAC or anything...
(Deleted comment)
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From:derspatchel
Date:December 11th, 2003 05:35 am (UTC)
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Because it would have ruined the punchline.
The sign really read "YOU ARE NOT AT AMERICAN" which makes no sense, really.
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From:signsoflife
Date:December 11th, 2003 03:08 pm (UTC)
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One of my proudest shoveling moments was shoveling out a space *exactly* big enough to fit our 2001 Civic (smaller than even most other Civics.) In fact, parking depended on backing into the form-fitting snowbank at the back of the space.

It was unstealable. Which is good, because I probably would have slashed a space-thief's tires.m

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