It's just this little chromium switch, here... (derspatchel) wrote,
It's just this little chromium switch, here...
derspatchel

BEEP BEEP I'M A FUTURE JEEP

It's become a busy time for Boston, "The Hollywood of New England", where there's a celebrity around every other corner and seven crew doods on their fifteen-minutes-every-half-hour Union Break around the other ones. And one of my favorite alleys on Necco street is getting to be a big star!

First, a few months ago, they brought in fake snow and dragged a Christmas tree from the back of a cuh-razy truck as part of The Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, a Matthew McConahguahguehguey/Jennifer Garner romcom (look, I'm just like Variety!) Matthew has been spotted all over town, including at a tanning salon one of my coworkers moonlights at. She told a story of the fellow hanging out waiting for his lucky booth (he apparently didn't want any other booth but the one he'd used before) while all around him, a bunch of BU girls milled awkwardly. They were tongue-tied. That's Mr. Charisma for you.

This past week or so, however, the alley is being used again for another film. This time it's a Bruce Willis sci-fi action adventure thingo called The Surrogates, which is set in THE FUTURE. It's also IN A WORLD WHERE people have decided to shun all contact and stay inside all day, preferring instead to interact with others through robot surrogates who get to navigate the real world. I can think of at least fifteen different people for whom this would be no problem at all, but the conflict here comes when someone starts (gasp) killing the surrogate robots! Oh no! So it's up to our hero Bruce, who's apparently a cop, to leave his house for the first time in ages (the day star! it burns! it burns!) and figure out the following curious conundrums:
  1. WHO is killing the robots?
  2. HOW COME they're killing these robots?
  3. WHY do we care that it's the robots what are gettin killed? Can't we just, like, go make some more, or has the Robot Factory run out?
I know, I know, maybe we'll have some object empathy for the robots in this film. Remember that creepy-ass carnival in A.I.? That gave me the heebie-jeebies something fierce, but somehow I don't think that's gonna be replicated here.

Coworker Double J actually watched 'em film last night after he finished his late shift. He watched several takes of a woman robot running out of a door of the abandoned Necco factory, now gussied up and known as the nightclub named "Bostonia Water Works" (says so right over the door in fake carved granite.) The robogirl takes off into the street and is suddenly hit by a motorcycle. Ka-pow! I'm sure when this is edited in post, it'll look really groovy. The motorcycle then races up Necco Street and collides with FUTURE JEEP.

We're pretty sure Bruce's stunt double was driving FUTURE JEEP. It was an old-ass Jeep Cherokee painted in sparkly metallic green and apparently that's how we can tell it's a futuristic vehicle. Remember how in Warrior of the Lost World, the Paper Chase Guy drove a futuristic motorcycle that was just dressed up by putting some sheets of Mylar on it and slapping a display screen between the handlebars? Yeah, that's what we'll do to this Jeep. Make and model bedamned! It's all shiny and green, people! It's FUTURE JEEP!

I'm calling it now, folks: FUTURE JEEP will undoubtedly be the highlight of the film, so keep your eyes peeled for its exciting action sequences. Actually, I'm pretty sure the movie's gonna stink on ice, but I'm gonna see it anyway because, hey, that's one of my favorite alleys.
Subscribe
  • Post a new comment

    Error

    Anonymous comments are disabled in this journal

    default userpic

    Your reply will be screened

    Your IP address will be recorded 

  • 14 comments