It's just this little chromium switch, here... (derspatchel) wrote,
It's just this little chromium switch, here...

speaking of trying too hard to see hidden mickeys...

Universal Hub links to a study of Boston-area coffee shops which concludes that women "...wait an average of 20 seconds longer for orders than male customers even when controlling for gender differences in orders." UH notes:
Author Caitlin Knowles Myers, an assistant professor of economics at Middlebury College, says the wait was even more pronounced in shops with male employees - women workers were less likely to try to hold women customers up. Not only that, but the baristas seem particularly disgusted by ugly customers - they had to wait longer for their orders than the beautiful people.
The story goes on to note that nearly 300 customer interactions were noted in eight "unnamed coffee shops in the Boston area", where observers noted each customer's gender, ranked their appearance, and timed their order. And they found a twenty second discrepancy upon average -- yet the statistical analysis, as noted on, shows that this discrepancy is measured in mere seconds. There isn't a significant difference in wait times. But those kinds of conclusions don't get grant moneys, kids! Let's look in now on a random Boston Coffee Shop and see how our professor friend is getting along...

PROF: Hey, barista!


PROF: You've got a lot of explaining to do.


PROF: I've been sitting here all afternoon, timing your order fulfillment times and listing them by gender and customer attractiveness.


PROF: My findings are conclusive: You, sir, make female customers wait an average of twenty whole seconds longer than male customers!


PROF: And that figure is compounded if the subject is ugly, as ranked on my Attractiveness Scale where 10 is Yowsa Yowsa Yowsa and 1 is You Ain't Got No Alibi.


PROF: Fashion sense also plays a part in it, but that's negligible right now since everybody's wearing black winter coats.


PROF: See those two? They placed identical orders. The man got his drink in two minutes and forty-five seconds. The woman got her drink in over three minutes! Nearly thirty whole seconds longer! How can you not rationalize this as anything but gender discrimination?

BORED BARISTA: We ran out of milk in the front fridge. Hadda go back to get some more.

PROF: And this other couple: He got his in a minute and a half, she got hers in a minute and fifty-five seconds. What have you to say to that?

BORED BARISTA: The second cup spilled a little, so I went and topped the coffee back off. Gee. I sure hope she didn't, like, die of thirst waiting that long or something.

PROF: Was that sarcasm? It was. Your nineteenth exhibition today.

BORED BARISTA: You're counting my sarcastic remarks too?

PROF: Yes, but that's an entirely different study for an entirely different grant. The point is that you are clearly exhibiting gender bias, whether you're aware of it or not. These statistics are proof positive that women and ugly people are being treated as coffeeshop inferiors, and my findings are going to shake the latte world to its very core! And it's all because of you!

BORED BARISTA: Listen, lady, we make every drink as fast as we can here. I can't help it if I spend a few more seconds on a drink just because someone's using the espresso machine before me and forgot to dump out the grounds or the squeezy bottle with the caramel syrup is on the other side of the counter and I gotta go get it, or if the plastic wrap on the new stack of cups is hard to open and I gotta use my teeth. A couple of seconds ain't a problem, and I haven't gotten any complaints. Everybody's, like, talking or listening to the music or using their Blackberries. Nobody's staring at their watches like you and counting the seconds like Rain Man.

PROF: Excuses, excuses, excuses. You're clearly not trying hard enough.

BORED BARISTA: Hey, like, I served that woman in under thirty seconds, but that guy had to wait like two minutes for his order.

PROF: Yeah, but he's probably gay.

BORED BARISTA: Oh come on...

PROF: No, you come on! This is clearly the most egregious case of discrimination I have ever seen and I've a right mind to sue, too, once I've published my results. And on a personal note, might I say that I've been absolutely disgusted with your actions over the past six hours.

BORED BARISTA: You've been sitting here for six hours?!

PROF: Yes, and--

BORED BARISTA: Dude! You haven't bought anything yet. You gotta buy something or else we'll hafta ask you to leave.

PROF: Okay, um, well, I'll have a tall cup of the AA dark blend with milk, no sugar.

BORED BARISTA (walking off): OK, that'll be ready in about... fifteen minutes. It's my break. Later.

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