I'll be playing the dog in Chatterbox's Rip Van Winkle next week. I feel like George Clooney.

(Reply) (Thread)

We did a touring Aesop's Fables kids' show in high school with Noah's slightly modernized takes on the stories; Androcles was a nice kid with a baseball cap and a dog named Spot. The role of Spot required an actor to mostly emoted but, like George Clooney's dog, got to say "Ruff!" every now and then.

The actor in the role of Spot (who was not me, and I mean that; I think I played Androcles here) understood he was taking on a role with very few lines but gamely played along until late in rehearsals when he started to milk the Serious Actor Preparing For His Line business.

ANDROCLES: Well, I'm Androcles, and this is my dog, Spot.

SPOT (after a Lengthy Pause, a round of What's-My-Next-Line-And-How-Should-I-Play-It complete with Raised Finger and Pensive Look, a Final Grandiose Build-Up for Maximum Dramatic Intensity and then a Confident, Self-Assured Delivery): Ruff!

NOAH THE DIRECTOR: Uh, Spot...

SPOT: What?! I was just trying to find my character's core here.


This was a elementary school tour, and at one school we put on the show at their playground ampitheatre, complete with wooden wall serving as a backdrop. In one of the stories I played a character who had to hide from gangsters, so in the outdoor show I decided to run back behind the wall and then jump up and peer over at the goings on instead of just crouching down and looking out from the wings.

I didn't realize I'd disturbed a paper wasp nest in my improvisation and an angry inhabitant flew down my t-shirt arm. I ran back out onstage before I realized what had happened and subsequently performed the last few scenes -- and the curtain call -- furiously trying to smush the goddamn wasp who in turn was furiously making big red welts up and down my side. In retrospect perhaps smushing the wasp against my bare skin wasn't such a hot concept, but my shirt was tucked too far in and my costume wasn't allowing any other exit.

Moral of the story: Know your set.

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

Know your set isn't one of Aesop's morals! Although "The Actor and The Wasp in His Shirt" is now my favorite fable, with "The Actor and The Cockroach up His Pants" a close second.

The writer/director for Rip Van Winkle asked if I could do a convincing dog bark, which I'd remembered from Fred Newman's Mouthsounds book (the first edition with the floppy record), so I said sure. Only after I tried I couldn't do it anymore, except for the teensiest dogs, and I started hacking after every bark. So the dog's gonna have a lung ailment, or I'm gonna have to go with an exhaling bark instead of an inhaling one.

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

So the dog's gonna have a lung ailment, or I'm gonna have to go with an exhaling bark instead of an inhaling one.

That reminds me of Doug MacKenzie's bedtime story about Ralph the Dog who gets into a fight with five other dogs, one of whom has emphysema because, as you know, dogs are heavy chain smokers.

But oh em gee, I remember Fred Newman's book! He was a god among crazy kids who wanted to do funny things with their voices back in the 80s. I think I was the only one in my city. I checked the book out from the library many times, but sadly there was no record inside.

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

The new version has a CD-ROM so you can watch and learn, but really all books should come with floppy records inside, like </i>Billy & The Boingers Bootleg</i>.

Fun note: looking up the Wikipedia entry on Flexi-disc, which I guess is the proper name for those floppy things, I discovered that the Soviet underground jazz scene used to distribute recordings on discarded X-rays, called roentgenizdat. That is undoubtedly the coolest thing I'll read today, unless someone on my friendslist gets attacked by a ninja or something.

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

One of my best Napster/Soulseek/Whatever acquisitions was Cuz I'm A Boinger on MP3. However I don't think I was able to get the B-Side, U Make Me Sick (But I Love U).

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

Ah, the internets are your friend today:

U Stink (But I Love U)

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

Shit, Cuz I'm A Boinger would make for one hell of a Guitar Hero encore track.


hay harmonix, you oughta get berke breathed's number...

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

I feel sorriest for all the literary agents right after Nano month. Raw Nano spew, excitedly called a "novel" by the "author," Piles up on their desk each December like the worst Christmas present ever.

(Reply) (Thread)

One of my quibbles with NaNo is that it encourages quantity over quality, and as someone who is prone to constantly rewriting sections until he's perfectly happy with them, it infuriates me to no end.

It's "nice" to encourage "writing habits" and "dedication" to a work, but by "god", "editing" is also "very", very "necessary"!

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

Rob - the point is to convince you that you can finish, if you set aside your inner editor. A lot of us spend so much time editing chapters over and over again that the story stagnates and never gets completed. The idea isn't to finish an edited novel, but to finish an entire novel draft so that you CAN do the editing. You aren't alone in rewriting sections over and over till they're perfect. I've got a novel I've been doing that with for over ten years. But you know what? That novel sits at 38,000 words - stuck in time, while my nanonovels, while they still need some work done on them, are completed and just need some editing and revision.

NanoEdMo, a month dedicated to spending hours and hours editing your novel (that you finished and set aside after november) is in March. It's not forgotten, just delayed.

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

I understand the point of an editing month and everything and how nice it is for some to light a fire underneath themselves and strive for completion; speed writing, however, just ain't my thing and when asked what I'm doing for November, I bring folks over to the fire and show the irons already in. I believe the fruits of those labors will be more beneficial to future projects than anything else.

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

I found my 50,000 in the liberry!

(Reply) (Thread)

(Reply) (Parent) (Thread)

Well, then try our delicious bite-sized flash fiction instead.

Community name: nano_wrimo (because I can't remember, or never cared to learn, how to make it a tag.)

(Reply) (Thread)