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January 22nd, 2007


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10:36 am
Yesterday's Red Line trip in to work had a special guest aboard the train. Apparently he had a lot of cookies and was more than eager to share them with other riders. He was a larger fellow, dressed in the manner that suggested someone who counts "professional subway and bus riding" as one of his careers. Apparently baking was also another one.

"You want a cookie?" he asked everybody who sat near him. "Hey, you want a cookie? I'm being very generous today. You two, you can have some cookies, because I'm generous." I politely refused, as while my mother never exactly taught me not to take cookies from strangers on the T, I'm sure it follows the same principles of her other lessons.

The guy was loud, almost aggressively friendly in his cookie handing-out, and made a point of loudly asserting his generosity. Then, once everybody was suitably cookie-fied, he took it upon himself to start his next round of speeches.

"George W Bush is a great man in the White House with great morals," he began, in an cadence that suggested he'd rote-memorized this statement or at least had taken great care to string his words together. "He will bring peace to this country with diplomacy, and we should all give thanks that he is in the White House. He is a great man. Hey, want a cookie?"

This certainly came out of left field. Although we had just swung thru Harvard, Central and Kendall, none of the Cantabrigians picked up felt necessary to debate him on his views (I've heard quite a few interesting arguments between oldschool hippies and neo-Larouchies, for one.) He seemed harmless enough, but might fly off the handle if provoked. And he may poison his cookies. At any rate, when the fellow spotted someone reading the Globe, it was time for another speech.

"The Herald is the only newspaper that tells it like it is," he said, in that same sing-song cadence. "If you want something sugar-coated, get a donut. If you want the truth, get the Herald. George W Bush is a great man in the White House with great morals. He will bring peace to this country with diplomacy..."

I left at South Station and he was still giving out cookies. I was kind of glad I didn't take a cookie.

(16 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:muse0fire
Date:January 22nd, 2007 03:45 pm (UTC)
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Sounds like he'd been drinkin' some GOP Kool-Aid with his cookies....

(which we all know is laced with some kind of drug produced by Halliburton factories.)
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:January 22nd, 2007 03:49 pm (UTC)
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I'm pretty sure somewhere else on the Orange Line, there was a fellow on the opposite end of the political spectrum talking up war crimes and whatnot, handing out brownies...

At least, I'd like to think that happened, so the Yin and Yang balance each other out.
[User Picture]
From:feoh
Date:January 22nd, 2007 08:31 pm (UTC)
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Sadly, chances are that *didn't* happen. Ever hear the old saw that goes something like "Evil is what happens when good does nothing"?
[User Picture]
From:plumtreeblossom
Date:January 22nd, 2007 04:04 pm (UTC)
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Nothing good could come from a neo-con cookie.
[User Picture]
From:muse0fire
Date:January 22nd, 2007 04:06 pm (UTC)
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icon love :-)
[User Picture]
From:allicat42
Date:January 22nd, 2007 05:16 pm (UTC)
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ditto - awesome icon!
[User Picture]
From:xiaomi
Date:January 22nd, 2007 08:40 pm (UTC)
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haha, best icon, well, all day at least, may I steal?
[User Picture]
From:plumtreeblossom
Date:January 22nd, 2007 09:05 pm (UTC)
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Sure! I got it from an agnostic community on LJ somewhere, so it seems only right that I pay it forward. :-)
[User Picture]
From:vanguardcdk
Date:January 22nd, 2007 04:59 pm (UTC)
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Ah yes the Herald..a bastion of truth! Just ignore the fact that it's 50% sports coverage and still the same size as the Globe... o_0
[User Picture]
From:cjfringe
Date:January 22nd, 2007 05:11 pm (UTC)
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I read about a study recently that said that the majority of mentally unhinged people strongly support George Bush. Apparently, the fact that he makes solid decisions and asserts his beliefs, however wrong, gives these people some stability in their life, that someone else is looking out for them and making the hard decisions. Sounds like your guy on the train was one of these.
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:January 22nd, 2007 05:36 pm (UTC)
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Well, he plays the Protector role very well and presents everything in simple, boiled-down black-and-white. We're the Good Guys. They're the Bad Guys who Don't Like Our Freedom. We will do everything we can to beat the Bad Guys, who could any day now hurt you and your family.

There are those in this world to whom this view is accessible and appealling. Unfortunately, the world isn't two-tone.
[User Picture]
From:redtheblue
Date:January 22nd, 2007 08:32 pm (UTC)
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So he got almost 50% of the popular vote thanks in large part to the Professional Bus- and Train-Riding, Seratonin-Roller-Coaster Lobby. I can sleep better tonight.
[User Picture]
From:joenotcharles
Date:January 22nd, 2007 05:37 pm (UTC)
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At least he wasn't offering around rum, like the last guy I shared a bus seat with.
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:January 22nd, 2007 06:20 pm (UTC)
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"How about you give me your address, and I'll write a letter to you?"
From:(Anonymous)
Date:January 23rd, 2007 01:11 pm (UTC)

Supreme Court Justices Stubbornly Refuse Poisoned Cookies

(Link)
Supreme Court Justices Stubbornly Refuse Poisoned Cookies

The worst assassination attempt in Washington history happened last year when some old nut in Connecticut — not Lieberman — mailed home-baked Rat Poison Cookies to each justice.

“Every member of the Supreme Court received a wonderful package of home-baked cookies, and I don’t know why, (but) the staff decided to analyze them,” Sandra Day O’Connor said at some legal conference last week.

Hmm, maybe the staffers were tipped off by the letters included with each package. You know, the ones that said, “I am going to kill you. This is poisoned.”

O’Connor details half-baked attempt to kill Supreme Court [CNN]

More:
http://wonkette.com/politics/supreme-court/supreme-court-justices-stubbornly-refuse-poisoned-cookies-215734.php

See also:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=389x10955
From:(Anonymous)
Date:January 23rd, 2007 03:56 pm (UTC)
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The problem with cookies baked by Bush supporters ...

They swear you'll find chocolate chips in them, but they never turn up.

If you're desperate for milk to wash them down, it won't come for weeks but the people who are supposed to bring it to you will still be praised for doing a heck of a job.

Just when you think you've got them down, there's an uprising.

Noah


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