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November 8th, 2006

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12:14 am - Mr. Grumpus-Pants Presents: The Pantheon of Lesser Holidays
If you go to this happy little webpage you will learn that America is such a great country with so many great holidays to observe, that over the years it has dealt with the overflow by relegating some holidays into the Pantheon of Lesser Holidays. Holidays such as "Z Day", for example, which is observed by letting people whose last names begin with Z stand in the front of the line for once (if, indeed, the line you're standing in is arranged in alphabetical order.)

And you will be most happy to discover that you can look up your birthday and see which lesser-known holiday you can observe on your day of birth.

On a whim, your humble author took it upon himself to look up his own birthday and discovered, much to his chagrin, that his birthday was...

...National Hugging Day.

Now I know what you're saying, "Oh, but Spatch! You are the huggiest of all hugglebunnies who ever hugged in the Huggin' Patch!" Pish-tosh and nonsense, I rumble, and petulantly adjust my pince-nez whilst simultaneously emptying the contents of my meerschaum into the ashcan.

Or maybe you're saying "But Spatch! I for one would be honored and delighted to know that I share the day of my birth with one devoted to hugging, if I were you."

Oh, would you, now? Let's consider the alternatives, had I attempted an early check-out or stayed around in the womb for a few more hours:

The day before my birthday? National Buttercrunch Day.

The day after my birthday? National Answer Your Cat's Question Day.

My actual birthday? National Hugging Day.





Boooooooo! I want a do-over! Booooooooooooooooooooooooo!!

(60 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:

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From:bostonista
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:18 am (UTC)
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My birthday is National Roast Suckling Pig Day. I think I'm okay with that.
(Deleted comment)
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From:derspatchel
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:23 am (UTC)
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Holy Fudd, I think you've won.

LUCKY!!
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From:rabswom
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:32 am (UTC)
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Quit your whinging. My birthday is "Middle Child's Day." I'm an only child!

And I missed "Sneak some Zucchini onto your neighbor's Porch Night" by 4 days!
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From:luckimunki
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:32 am (UTC)
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My birthday? Both National Relaxation Day and National Failures Day. Somehow it just fits.
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From:maga_dogg
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:32 am (UTC)
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My birthday is National Step in a Puddle and Splash your Friend Day. I feel a [citation needed] edit coming on.
[User Picture]
From:hemlock_martini
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:34 am (UTC)
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March 31 is...Bunsen Burner Day and National Clams On The Half Shell Day

You wanna switch? Hugs I can do. I haven't played with Bunsen Burners since 10th grade and I'm not that big on mollusks in general.
[User Picture]
From:kissoflife
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:48 am (UTC)

feeling very Charlie Brown right now

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"I got a rock."

January 7 is . . . . .Old Rock Day
From:oakenguy
Date:November 8th, 2006 02:59 pm (UTC)

Re: feeling very Charlie Brown right now

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If it helps, think of it as Chuck Berry/Buddy Holly Appreciation Day?
[User Picture]
From:granuaile
Date:November 8th, 2006 05:58 am (UTC)
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My birthday is " Blessing of the Animals at the Cathedral Day"

Yep, I think I'll take in the rats. ^_^
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 8th, 2006 06:49 am (UTC)
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I double-dog dare you.
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From:quodlibetic
Date:November 8th, 2006 06:04 am (UTC)
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National Moldy Cheese Day, here. Holla!
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From:terras
Date:November 8th, 2006 06:13 am (UTC)
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My birthday is Multiple Personalities Day. My other personalities want different holidays from each other.

+1 is National Frozen Food Day
-1 is Holy Experiment Day

I don't know, Holy Experiment Day sounds kind of... diabolical.
[User Picture]
From:allicat42
Date:November 8th, 2006 03:32 pm (UTC)
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(especially if the experiments are done with frozen food!)
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From:pecosy
Date:November 8th, 2006 06:21 am (UTC)
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Supreme Sacrifice Day. Screw that.

Just missed Submarine Day and Poultry Day, both of which absolutely shine compared to Supreme Sacrifice Day.
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From:off_coloratura
Date:November 8th, 2006 06:27 am (UTC)
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My birthday has TWO holidays: National Juggling Day and Kitchen Klutzes of America Day.

It strikes me that these two holidays do not play well together.
[User Picture]
From:allicat42
Date:November 8th, 2006 03:33 pm (UTC)
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Doesn't Klutz put out a juggling book...?
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From:ooshiny
Date:November 8th, 2006 07:20 am (UTC)
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National Gum Drop Day! Put that in your pipe and smoke it! ...or don't. Burnt sugar stinks.
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From:semer
Date:November 8th, 2006 07:25 am (UTC)
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It doesn't even seem fair for you to complain when I missed National Play God Day by a damn day. One lousy day. Really mere hours, when you think about it...
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From:spritelord
Date:November 8th, 2006 07:54 am (UTC)
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Dunce day. I think I'm unhappy now.

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