March 17th, 2006
|11:49 pm - The Insult That Made A Man Out Of "Mac"|
Miss L.: IMPRESS YOUR FRIENDS! X-RAY SPECS
Mr. S.: "IT REALLY WORKS"
Miss L.:watch them give birth -- LIVE SEA MONKEYS!!!! *little crowns*
Mr. S.: BOYS! SEND NOW FOR 1,000 "FIGHTIN' MEN" IN FULL DETAIL
Miss L.: Exotic And Rare Stamps From All Over The World -- 400 for $7.50!
Mr. S.: Learn To Throw Your Voice! Fool Your Friends! Fun At Parties!
Miss L.: Electric hand buzzer -- SHOCK YOUR ENEMIES!
Mr. S.: LEARN THE ART OF "KARA-TE" -- THE ORIENT'S MOST DEADLY ART
Miss L.: Red Hot Chewing Gum -- Looks Like Regular Gum!
Mr. S.: Tijuana Bibles. All kinds from Popeye to Blondie. 6 for 75 cents. P.O. Box 925, Weehauken, New Jersey.
Miss L.: Magic soap -- turns hands BLACK!
Mr. S.: KIDS! Earn this swell SCHWINN BIKE by selling "GRIT" to your family, friends and neighbors!
ROACH T-SHIRT TRANSFERS
Beep Beep - Peace Sign - Smiley Face - Ecology Flag
|Date:||March 18th, 2006 05:54 am (UTC)|| |
What the fuck was GRIT, anyway?
One of those blandly charming "slice of America" magazines. May lean to the right, I can't remember. The current issue
features articles with titles like "North Dakota's Enchanted Highway Showcases Unique Folk Sculptures" and "The Main Thing In Maine Is Lobsters."
Oh, Richie Rich once showed Gloria how to sell Grit, and then all their pals sold Grit. And then they saturated the market and withered out. Professor Keenbean should've warned 'em, I swear.
Aww, and here was me imagining tiny moppets staggering door-to-door under the weight of huge sacks of low-grade rock salt, suitable for keeping driveways free of ice.
I remember all that stuff from the seedy back-pages of Boys Life. DAMN, how I wanted that hovercraft kit. Only $20! No more school bus for me.