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November 16th, 2005


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10:33 am - MOVIE MAGIC
Well production on CAPTAIN COSMOS VS THE MARTIAN ROBOTS EP 1 has been halted after the first attempt at filming. There seems to be a bug in the program that prevents characters from changing costumes from scene to scene. This means that my attempt to be super cheap and recycle actors has failed, as Captain Cosmos fires his pistol in one shot and then falls over, in the good Captain's uniform, in the next. Once we hire more extras I am sure the next shoot will be no problem. Additionally, I started making movies in Sandbox Mode, which means over 10 mil and instant films and stuff, so it'll be easier to fix things.

Keeping that in mind, I spent five minutes last night producing my first avant garde film. It was thrown together quickly using the Advanced editor, and I didn't bother to actually assign default costumes to the actors so clothing changes from shot to shot. THIS IS PART OF THE ART. DO NOT QUESTION IT. Additionally there is unease, malaise, the worst German ever (translated, without context, directly from Babelfish and transcribed in the shaky hand of one in the throes of a sugar rush) and a trip to the furniture store.

I present to you, then
STURM UND DRANG (Windows Media File, roughly 3 megabytes or so)

...and, as they say, enjoy.

(21 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:allicat42
Date:November 16th, 2005 03:51 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Your request

"http://www.spatch.net/"

was denied by the content filter because it is categorized as:

"Games;Entertainment"

*WAH!*
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:06 pm (UTC)
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FILTERED!!
[User Picture]
From:eeka13
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:43 pm (UTC)
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Spatchula, can you label the film as, uh, educational or something?
[User Picture]
From:eeka13
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:03 pm (UTC)
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AAAAAAHAHAHAHA THAT'S FUCKED UP

I'll copy edit later if you want ;o)
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:13 pm (UTC)
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The translation is much of the charm. Lauren helpfully pointed out "my living room (room which is alive)" last night, and I think it works very well considering the, uh... zeitgeist and all.
[User Picture]
From:eeka13
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:43 pm (UTC)
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Yep, I laughed at your alive room too.
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:48 pm (UTC)
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The original script went like this:

We are going to the furniture store.
We will buy practical furniture at good prices.
There is always plenty of free parking.
We're here!
My living room is no longer empty.
We will sit on chairs and watch television.

fin


For what it's worth, "We're here!" is my favoritest part ever. I've watched it like a zillion times already.
[User Picture]
From:eeka13
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:50 pm (UTC)
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HEE!

Your parking was vacant though, not costless. ;o)
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:50 pm (UTC)
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...which is why parking is plentiful, of course.
From:katre50
Date:November 16th, 2005 04:18 pm (UTC)
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That is so incredibly awesome. Keep up the good work, I look forward to more!
[User Picture]
From:markm
Date:November 16th, 2005 05:20 pm (UTC)
(Link)
I just downloaded this and, oh man, that German. Here's the best I can do with it (assuming 'Mobel' is 'Möbel'. It starts off sorta ok:

We're going to the furniture crossing
There we'll buy practical furniture
of good Prices. (although 'zu niedrigen Preisen' is probably better')
One can find plenty of open parking

We are here!

My living (alive) Room
Is no more vacant (actually, 'leer' is used for batteries to indicate they're dead, so there's ALMOST a bit of clever word usage here)
Now may (können) we on the chair
Sit and television
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 05:23 pm (UTC)
(Link)
The near-pun with 'leer' is enough to make me want to rely on Babelfish for all my avant-garde film translation.
[User Picture]
From:brak55
Date:November 16th, 2005 05:45 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Brilliant! You must move to Europe NOW and become their leading director.

I especially like the lines on the film. What, can't afford good stock :) .
[User Picture]
From:tablesaw
Date:November 16th, 2005 06:11 pm (UTC)
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Can you recommended a soundtrack, or should I just pick a random Wagner recording?
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 06:27 pm (UTC)
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I used some random track from The Movies called "Synthesizer Love" or something. It sounded better than alley cat jazz or whatever.
From:spun_lepton
Date:November 16th, 2005 07:12 pm (UTC)
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No zombies?!
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 16th, 2005 07:50 pm (UTC)
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Zombies soon! I need to unlock the RAWR SCARY MONSTAR COSTOOMES!1 pack first.
From:(Anonymous)
Date:November 17th, 2005 01:20 am (UTC)

Keith

(Link)
Do you want to touch my monkey?
[User Picture]
From:joenotcharles
Date:November 17th, 2005 03:22 am (UTC)
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So, are those scenes prepacked and just strung together in order and put against backgrounds by you? Or is it figuring out ow the models interact on the fly?
[User Picture]
From:fancycwabs
Date:November 17th, 2005 03:33 am (UTC)
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I'm pretty sure that was the undiscovered fourth iteration in Run Lola Run.
[User Picture]
From:josh_giesbrecht
Date:November 17th, 2005 09:20 pm (UTC)
(Link)
PURE GENIUS!!!!~!!~11`

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