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May 3rd, 2005

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10:56 pm - durak takoi! (batz, boom)
OKAY SO WHEN YOU GO TO A NICE RUSSIAN RESTAURANT and the place has a subdued Romanov look to it and the prices reflect the glory days of the Tsar and you're one of only two people in the place who are primarily speaking English, what would you least expect them to do while you're eating?

1. Smoke cigarettes like they're going out of style, for that authentic Muscovite atmosphere.
2. Have some guy dressed up as Rasputin come over and tell you how ees everytheeng so far.
3. Give you a menu that suggests nylons and soap with your appetizer instead of wine.
4. Turn off the traditional Russian folk tunes, put American Idol on the TV over the fashionable vodka bar, and have it play very loudly as you're trying to enjoy your borscht and pirozhki.

The Russians in the place, it turns out, are all rooting for some skinny blonde kid using a patronymic surname. He didn't do so well this week, though. The borscht, however, was mighty tasty.

(5 comments | Leave a comment)


[User Picture]
Date:May 4th, 2005 04:07 am (UTC)
Man, I hate that kid.
Date:May 4th, 2005 04:15 pm (UTC)
Fedorov hasn't done so well this year.
Date:May 4th, 2005 08:56 pm (UTC)
Yeah, he really sucks. But i guess the teenage girls think he's cute.
Date:May 4th, 2005 11:56 pm (UTC)
Mmmmm. Borscht.
[User Picture]
Date:May 5th, 2005 12:11 am (UTC)
If only the show didn't have "America" right there in the title, and if only it weren't bigger than democracy, then maybe I could feel something less than a Biblical contempt for it.

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