May 24th, 2007

Typewriter Guy

it's headline time!

Well, now that Boston's apparently a four-newspaper town, it's interesting to see which stories each plays up the loudest on their front page during a typical news day when nothing big is happening, like cartoon aliens taking over or something. Here's a summary of the front pages of our Four. The first headline is the largest or wordiest one, first to be noticed if you do things like read words. The second headline listed is the headline, or the blurb if that's all it is, for the largest picture on the front page, which calls out to people what like pretty colors or ladies with boobs. Let's see! The links, by the way, go to the current print edition of each paper online, though I can't guarantee they'll be fresh by May 25. Also, the Metro and BostonNOW!1 present theirs in PDF format, just FYI.

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I find it fascinating what each paper considers important enough to run on Page 1 given their ideas of coverage, readership, and the time they go to press every night.

Oh, and on a final note, that BostonNOW contest which promises $1000? It's a daily contest where, if you see your first name mentioned in the paper, you can enter the daily drawing. Yep. That's it. All you have to do is read the paper ("It'll take no more than 20 minutes!" the rules helpfully reassure you) and if you done see yore first name writ inside somewhares, gradulashuns u may win!

I wonder what rules are in place for those of us with first names that also double as verbs, nouns, common adjectives or any combination of such. Would "May Harper" be eligible to win every day a daily calendar of events is published? What if they run a story about plans for a white-collar crew to rob their employer? What if Shaw's ran an ad for ground chuck on sale? Or if a criminal threw himself at the mercy of the court? See where I'm going here? I CAN'T STOP THINKING!!
Spike Dancing The Hula

i gotta believe!

All right, we're here, just sitting in the car.
I want you to show me if you can get far!
Step on the gas!
Step on the brakes!
Now step on the gas!

When I say boom boom boom, you say bam bam bam
No pause in between, c'mon, let's jam!
Step on the gas!
Step on the brakes!
Step on the brakes!
Step on the gas!

I'm glad you know which way to go
But it ain't gonna stop me, here we go!
Check and turn the signal to the right
Now turn to the right!
Check and turn the signal to the left
Now turn to the left!

Whoa ho ho ho, stop the car! We got an emergency, can't you see?

Do you know why we stopped the car?
Guess
What?
Do you know why we stopped the car?
Guess
What?

I forgot to close the door.

Hmmph.

Now just don't forget, this ain't Kung Fu, come on again!
Check and turn the signal to the right!
Step on the gas, now turn to the right!
Check and turn the signal to the left!
Step on the gas, now turn to the left!
Step on the brakes!

Do you know why we stopped the car again?
That's because you just got your license.
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