November 8th, 2006

SAD SPATCH

Mr. Grumpus-Pants Presents: The Pantheon of Lesser Holidays

If you go to this happy little webpage you will learn that America is such a great country with so many great holidays to observe, that over the years it has dealt with the overflow by relegating some holidays into the Pantheon of Lesser Holidays. Holidays such as "Z Day", for example, which is observed by letting people whose last names begin with Z stand in the front of the line for once (if, indeed, the line you're standing in is arranged in alphabetical order.)

And you will be most happy to discover that you can look up your birthday and see which lesser-known holiday you can observe on your day of birth.

On a whim, your humble author took it upon himself to look up his own birthday and discovered, much to his chagrin, that his birthday was...

...National Hugging Day.

Now I know what you're saying, "Oh, but Spatch! You are the huggiest of all hugglebunnies who ever hugged in the Huggin' Patch!" Pish-tosh and nonsense, I rumble, and petulantly adjust my pince-nez whilst simultaneously emptying the contents of my meerschaum into the ashcan.

Or maybe you're saying "But Spatch! I for one would be honored and delighted to know that I share the day of my birth with one devoted to hugging, if I were you."

Oh, would you, now? Let's consider the alternatives, had I attempted an early check-out or stayed around in the womb for a few more hours:

The day before my birthday? National Buttercrunch Day.

The day after my birthday? National Answer Your Cat's Question Day.

My actual birthday? National Hugging Day.





Boooooooo! I want a do-over! Booooooooooooooooooooooooo!!
The Simpsons - Screw You

[GIP] Golly, It's Pretty!

Yes, brand-new icon straight from the Simpsons' most recent Treehouse of Horror (which amazed me in that it showed that at least some of the folks on the show still have a bit of a bite when they feel the need to.) I think I'll use it for those times when I'm feeling, you know, not so fresh.