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i make watch telelevisions - EXCELSIOR, YOU FATHEAD!

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July 8th, 2008


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11:39 pm - i make watch telelevisions
1. Delta and the Bannermen, a Doctor Who serial from 1987 starring Sylvester McCoy as the Doctor and Bonnie Langford as Mel, the screamiest companion ever. And you were right, dskasak. It was pretty awful. Paradise Towers is goofy and bad, and so it gets a pass because you can laugh at it and feel like it's a guilty pleasure. But with this one, the "oh god, that's bad" overwhelmed the "so bad it's good" camp in a serious way. I tried to find things to like about it -- Stubby Kaye was in it, that was cool! But his role is completely useless! He and the guy with the Worst Southern American Accent Ever are part of this C story that contributes nothing to the main adventure at hand!

The girl playing the motorcyclist was rather cute! But... all she did was pine for a boy and ride around on the motorcycle, giving us the Doctor Who equivalent of Rock Climbing. Any time the episode needed padding, they just threw in a few more shots of everybody gaily riding about on their motorcycles. Eventually the group gets too large so they add a car to the parade. How fun! Mel even waves hello to cows from a sidecar. Yes. SHE WAVES HELLO TO COWS. They're hurriedly escaping from vicious, cold-blooded warrior types and seeking a safe spot, riding through the Welsh countryside, and Mel's WAVING HELLO TO FREAKING COWS. She didn't even call them on her side, so I called them from my side, and that means Mel lost all her cows.

But I absolutely lost it when we got to the baby painted green. (For those of you without a shred of context, yes, all this is entirely true, including the green baby. And the Rock Climbing motorcycle riding. DEEP HURTING. DEEEEEP HURTING.)

2. This week's episode of the Venture Bros. Now there's some quality Scooby-Doo style adventuring gone horribly awry. HORRIBLY SEXY AWRY! Was this episode written after six months at sea? My god. It was like Brock fighting Molotov Cocktease times three. I wonder how many concessions Jackson Publick and Doc Hammer had to make to the Cartoon Network Standards & Practices department (or whatever they're called) in order to get this one approved. I wonder how many bits of other episodes they had to rein in to make the deal. Or perhaps they did the ol' trick of including much, much, much more Verboten material to make the stuff they eventually got away with seem tame in comparison. I don't know. There's parts in this episode that you won't be able to unsee. And I suspect the Rule 34 guys are going absolutely apeshit right about now.

Now it's time to pretend to pass out for a few hours. Wish us luck. The heat is oppressively heat-y.

(4 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:sanspoof
Date:July 9th, 2008 04:46 am (UTC)
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Venture Bros: did you note the identity of the dude Col. Gentleman was hitting on? ♥ ♥
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:July 9th, 2008 09:31 pm (UTC)
(Link)
No, I didn't notice because I was too busy noticing Sammy Davis, Jr. in that shot. I may have to go back and check.

Is it also wrong that I immediately pegged Dr. Venture's party as a key party from the moment he answered the door?
[User Picture]
From:sanspoof
Date:July 9th, 2008 09:40 pm (UTC)
(Link)
Hint: this and this.

I had to look up what a key party was. Very PhilDickian.

(Deleted comment)

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