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HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY, ABBIE THE CAT - EXCELSIOR, YOU FATHEAD!

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July 4th, 2008


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07:43 pm - HAPPY FOURTH OF JULY, ABBIE THE CAT
The other day I opened Abbie's bag of cat food and watched a grain moth fly out.

"Get it!" I said to His Nibs, but he wasn't going in for it. I looked in the bag and I saw a little grain moth larva all wriggling around indignantly too. This I did not tell Abbie to get. I mean, sure, the extra protein could help the cat some, but what would people say if word got out that I was feeding him moth larvae? If he was eating them of his own volition then that might be all right, but I'm not going to be the one to put them in his bowl.

To solve this problem I went out to the store and bought a new bag of cat food and a giant plastic airtight bin. It is a nice thing to know that the bin contains almost an entire bag of cat food, minus the amount you put in his bowl when you fill it up. Makes thinking easier.

However, we had purchased a boring-looking plastic bin -- clear, so you could see the awesome cat food strata, but boring nonetheless, and I realized I needed to label it lest someone think it was, I don't know, breakfast cereal, and pour themselves a big delicious bowl and munch away before the cat indignantly jumped up and demanded what the hell was going on with his food.

Abbie the Cat's All-American Cat Food

So I made a nice label for the bin. Now everybody will know to steer clear unless they're going to feed the cat! Isn't that helpful? And seeing as how it was the Fourth of July, well, I put a special patriotic slant on it.

Oh, and there's stuff on the side, too. You will note that it is sometimes very hard to draw on somewhat porous construction-like paper with a Sharpie marker. Maybe the next label will be drawn with a rollerball pen, lord love em.

Ingredients of Abbie the Cat's All-American Cat Food Side of Abbie the Cat's All-American Cat Food

(17 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


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From:arielblue
Date:July 4th, 2008 11:56 pm (UTC)
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Oh, great. Now my guys want to know why their food is in a plain old ordinary beige plastic bin and not a special fancy labeled one. I don't think "because your human is about ten times lazier than Abbie's human" is going to fly with them.
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From:eeka13
Date:July 5th, 2008 01:08 am (UTC)
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BAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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From:28bytes
Date:July 5th, 2008 01:26 am (UTC)
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The barcode is a nice touch.
(Deleted comment)
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From:toodleskitty
Date:July 5th, 2008 04:10 am (UTC)
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Abbie the boy cat. I love it!

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From:derspatchel
Date:July 6th, 2008 06:02 pm (UTC)
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There is a long and possibly interesting story behind it! Fortunately, it has a happy ending!
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From:toodleskitty
Date:July 6th, 2008 09:17 pm (UTC)
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I am ASSuming he is named after the wonderful Abbie Hoffman. ;-)

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From:muffyjo
Date:July 5th, 2008 05:53 am (UTC)
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That's some bonafide patriotic downright DOWN HOME artwork there. Very nicely done!
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From:babs_the_nymph
Date:July 5th, 2008 06:25 am (UTC)
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I loves me some Abbie stories. Well played!
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From:semer
Date:July 10th, 2008 02:50 pm (UTC)
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I love your kitty (is it yours or just an icon?). Black cats ftw.
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From:babs_the_nymph
Date:July 10th, 2008 04:55 pm (UTC)
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That is Juno, my cat. She is awesome and snuggly and always wanting the gooshy foods.
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From:hyperina
Date:July 5th, 2008 06:35 am (UTC)
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hmmm, I for one would pay top dollar for decent cat food packaged just so! MARKET IT
From:cynicalgal
Date:July 5th, 2008 01:33 pm (UTC)
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Gotta love the Big Honkin' Cat Sizeness of it all. As for the Other Stuff: I would definitely buy me some Whine Away (lord, please), but what - or who - in the world is Catnip Bill, and why would my cat want one?
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From:derspatchel
Date:July 5th, 2008 02:23 pm (UTC)
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Catnip Bill was the first toy we bought for the cats when they was kittens oh so long ago. It was a Bill Clinton doll stuffed with catnip. Abbie loved Catnip Bill, but we lost him in a move somewhere. (Catnip Bill, not Abbie.) Now he has Catnip Frog and while the frog is no Bill, it's still a dear friend.

Whine-Away is any object used to drive Abbie away when he gets complainy at 4 in the morning. A rolled-up sock works nicely sometimes.

Edited at 2008-07-05 02:23 pm (UTC)
[User Picture]
From:sernin
Date:July 5th, 2008 06:37 pm (UTC)
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ah, I was secretly hoping that it was a nod to Mr. Breathed.
From:cynicalgal
Date:July 5th, 2008 07:00 pm (UTC)
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Ack.
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From:semer
Date:July 10th, 2008 02:52 pm (UTC)
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Is Abbie a big catnip fan? It's so weird; our last two cats really didn't care one way or the other if something was nipped, but our most recent, Tucker, is like a crazy maniacal addict, such that if you give him some he covers the entire 8x12ft or so carpet with a thick coating of his fur from all the thrashing and rolling about he does with it.

It's NUTS.

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