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November 28th, 2007


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10:48 am - what
Funny night, last night.

Bought a burrito, went home, sat down with Guitar Hero, fiddled a bit, then went upstairs to read a bit. Around 7:00 I put the book down and rolled over and didn't wake up until 1:30 am.

I was still in my street clothes, my bedside light was still on, and Abbie was on top of my feet looking Very Alert. I think he'd been peacefully snoozing along with me and jumped up suddenly, which then disturbed my slumber as well. He leapt off the bed and into his little hobbit hole. All was silent for a minute or so, then there was one heck of a crash and Abbie came dashing out, victorious, with a mouse in his mouth.

"Attaboy!" I said. "Way to go!" How he heard the mouse all the way over there I don't know, but it amazed me. Then he proceeded to jump up on the bed and drop the mouse at my feet. It began to make a run for it, so he pounced again, grabbed it, and took it to the floor.

"Finish him!" I cheered, all Mortal Kombat-like. The cat dropped the mouse again, who ran underneath some plastic bags. Abbie swatted at the plastic bags with furious smacks of his humongous paws -- wham! wham! wham! -- and out came the mouse, which was promptly flipped up into the air again, then smacked around a few more times before it scampered under something else. Oh but this does not deter our Mighty Hunter, who leapt into the fray, scattering books and some boxes and whatnot in an attempt to git that thar mouse. Realizing that one dead mouse being chewed up is better than one live mouse chewing up stuff, I decided to let Abbie do his thing however noisily and worry the mouse to death. (He's good at worrying his prey. One early spring morning in 1998 I left for work as he and Martha were curiously batting around a slow-witted just-woken-up bumblebee they'd found. Coming home 8 hours later expecting to find a cat with a stinger in its mouth, I actually found them still playing with the bumblebee, which hadn't died just yet. Oh, you lovably sadistic furballs.)

I went downstairs and realized I'd passed out upstairs leaving everything downstairs in a state of On. The burrito was waiting for me, still in its bag. The computer was waiting to log on to World of Warcraft. I even had a glass of scotch on the desk, waiting to be enjoyed. I felt like I'd just come aboard a ship mysteriously abandoned at sea. I reheated the burrito, curled up on the couch, enjoyed my dinner with scotch, and wondered what the neighbors below the bedroom must be thinking as Abbie went about his mighty hunting ways. I went back upstairs around 3:30 to find Abbie still in Prowl Mode, looking near the dresser. No mouse was to be found and he was still in a state of High Alert.

"You didn't get him yet?" I asked. He took a pat on the head but kept to his post. Can't talk; mousing. I crawled back into bed and tucked my head between the pillows to blot out the sound, and drifted off to sleep once more. At 5:30 I woke to hear a scribbling sound along the baseboard under the dresser, and there's Mr. The Cat still in the spot I left him in two hours previously.

"What are you waiting for?" I asked the Zen Master, who does not respond. Oh, please tell me you haven't lost interest in it. You brought the goddamn mouse into my room, pal, you're gonna be the one to remove it. At this point I decided there was no use pretending to sleep because at some point there's gonna be a crash and a bang and a cat with a mouse in its mouth, so I took my shower and wandered back downstairs to do... oh god I don't know, something, anything. Guitar Hero is weird to play when you've just woken up. You need catlike reflexes, man. So did Mr. Lump Of Fur Who's Not Finishing What He Started, I think.

I hope I get home to find a mouse tail sticking out of his mouth.

(12 comments | Leave a comment)

Comments:


[User Picture]
From:sanspoof
Date:November 28th, 2007 04:32 pm (UTC)
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Not Everyone Knows that with predators that have been domesticated, the prey drive sequence can have pieces missing. With wild adult predators, it's something akin to chase --> catch-bite --> kill-bite --> dissect --> eat. Sounds like Abbie is missing kill-bite.

I RUIN EVERYTHING, I KNOW
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 28th, 2007 04:42 pm (UTC)
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YOU RUINER OH THE DAY IS RUINED

Thing is, Abbie does have kill-bite or he's done enough damage before without knowing it. I've seen him kill mice, have had to dispose of deadified mouse bodies, and on at least one occasion have seen him happily chomping away on his trophy.

Maybe he was just bored last night and wanted to play with Happy Fun Mouse.
[User Picture]
From:sanspoof
Date:November 28th, 2007 05:51 pm (UTC)
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Well, see, mice can die of fright, and it's not too hard to kill them via worrying or accidentally (me being a longtime mouse-as-pet owner), so who knows, I guess? Maybe his killbite is just sort of weakly present? Anyhow, rest assured, hantavirus is all but unknown in the northeast. Yay.
[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 28th, 2007 05:58 pm (UTC)
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I'm full aware of the parent/child dichotomy when it comes to cats' relationships with people (they consider you the parent figure when they knead you with their claws as it's a regression to kittenhood and feeding from mama; they consider you the child in need of education when they present you with dead animals, saying in effect "I don't see you hunting, so this is how you do it")...

but...

it's more fun to think that Abbie brings me the deadified mouse as if to say "Hey, this one's batteries ran out! Can we get a new one?"
From:zhym
Date:November 28th, 2007 07:49 pm (UTC)
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Dead mice aren't much fun.

A well-fed cat doesn't need to kill a mouse to eat it, and once the mouse is dead is just sits there, so a smart cat will make sure not to damage his toy. Abbie is a smart cat. He might keep that mouse alive for days. Especially since you obviously didn't want it. :)

[User Picture]
From:derspatchel
Date:November 28th, 2007 08:06 pm (UTC)
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A well-fed cat doesn't need to kill a mouse to eat it

According to Abbie, he is NEVER FED and it ISN'T FAIR and NOBODY EVER GIVES HIM FOOD and HE CAN SEE THE BOTTOM OF HIS FOOD BOWL and it's a TRAVESTY in ALL-CAPS and the ASPCA IS GOING TO HEAR ABOUT THIS and ARE YOU GOING TO FINISH THAT?
[User Picture]
From:fancycwabs
Date:November 28th, 2007 04:55 pm (UTC)
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Maybe Abbie respecced to Combat spec instead of Assassination spec.

Edit: This was supposed to be reply-to-comment, not reply-to-post. Stupid buttons.

Edited at 2007-11-28 04:57 pm (UTC)
[User Picture]
From:plumtreeblossom
Date:November 28th, 2007 05:01 pm (UTC)
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I thoroughly enjoyed this.
[User Picture]
From:ericjay
Date:November 28th, 2007 05:58 pm (UTC)
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Line of the day:
Can't talk; mousing.
Abbie FTW
[User Picture]
From:pecosy
Date:November 28th, 2007 10:49 pm (UTC)
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Man, I could never leave stoopid kitty alone to deal with prey. She's got the killer instinct, but she's horrible at tracking. Once she loses sight of her prey, the varmint is home-free IN MY HOME. I scoop those suckers up as soon as she exposes them. Poor kitty, no playtime for her.
From:(Anonymous)
Date:November 29th, 2007 01:34 pm (UTC)

Just Hilarious

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Like the subject line says.

Suldog
http://jimsuldog.blogspot.com
[User Picture]
From:mybadhairlife
Date:November 29th, 2007 04:04 pm (UTC)
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Abbie hunts like my former kitty, The Little Cat Max.

She would lie by the mouse hole for 16 hours until she caught the mouse, then she'd play with it until it died or got away. If it got away, she'd just start all over again.

Her favourite thing to do was smack the mouse for distance. EEEeeeeeeee - thud.


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